Catherine Beerda-Basso
Reflections
March 26th, 20243/26/2024 ![]() Breathing myself out of The Shadows I find myself breathing deeply these days. There has been much to witness, much to release much to face and much to process. I recently had a thought that life isn’t about being easy or hard. life if Life And that, for me, encompasses All. ![]() During my 55 years of walking this earth, I have come to discover that sometimes I must move into the shadows, I must move into the darkness of my being, in order to find the light and this is no small undertaking. These kinds of journeys have often brought pain or been spurred on by deep grief. And with each journey, I seem to know less and expand more. Recently, I found out a little more about the caterpillar metamorphosis into being in a butterfly. I was aware that a caterpillar turns into slime before rebirthing into the form of the butterfly. However, what I did not know is that within that process, there are certain cells within the caterpillar that fight this transformation, and until those cells die the transformation is not able to begin. ![]() What I found fascinating about that was that, even though a caterpillar consciousness is different than my own, even with them, there is resistance. This spoke to me that perhaps resistance is part of this life experience, and it’s not about feeling shame or guilt in my resistance, or even trying to fix it. Perhaps it’s more about leaning into the resistance, seeing it for what it is -a natural part of process- and acknowledging it as I continue to transform and rebirth. A kind of ‘feel the fear and do it anyways’ thing, I’m invited into. Truth is, for me, it is a necessity so I can live fully, and completely into this life I’ve been given. Winter has been a dark and necessary time, AND I am emerging, once again. And like the butterfly, the chick, the baby bird, I must break out of a shell, that once held me. This spring it looks like leaving my precious and treasured home, in which I lived for 21 years. This home, that grew both of my man-children. This home, that held hamsters, a rabbit and three dogs. This home, that has held both my and my husband’s businesses and way of life. This home, that came to us as such a gift, in a time when we, seemingly, had nothing. This home that told me it would be the place where the women would gather and pray; and gather they did! This home. This sweet home that has held so much, for so many has let me know that we have ‘outgrown’ it. We have completed what we came here to do. Raised our children, built our family, solidified our foundation and it is now time to leave it behind and move into the next season of our lives. A season that sees us not only leaving our home, but the community that home is found in. You can image this has brought up many emotions for each of us, as well as for those who have communed within these walls and on this precious little piece of land.
Leaving behind what you know is not easy. Leaving behind what you love deeply is life changing. We have decided to take the challenge, crack the egg, and invite in what is already waiting for us. I am forever grateful for how Life weaves in support, in unexpected way, to help us through these hard changes and decisions. My legs are shaky, my heart is strong, and my mind exhausted & willing. And it is here, I remain. Breathing myself out of the shadows. For the air in our lungs For the invitation to begin again For new beginnings and renewed life For Illumination Clarity and Wisdom For Eagle Vision and Hawk Focus Where does Spring find you, my friend?
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